What does the limelight blot out?

All of us know the pretty faces from the covers of the magazines. Their beautiful eyes, perfect skin, wide smile, skinny posture. Getting to the world of modelling seems to be one of the most desirable things among youth. But after one becomes acquainted to this specific “dream” occupation it turns out not to be a bed of roses.

Most of people starting a modelling career are just kids, waiting for years to pass faster, to grow taller, trying to be more and more skinny, not sleeping the nights trying to imagine how great feeling it is to look at yourself at the cover of the magazine. Been there, done that. After all the sweet things seen in the television, read in the magazines or on some websites I was full of excitement going on my first modelling contract to Bangkok. And then, all of a sudden, my whole world perception collapsed. They said it was normal, ordinary, that it is me who came out of the blue with some fossil outlooks about my peers.

Being used to thinking that drugs are bad and people drinking alcohol everyday are those under serious problem and should receive special treatment I was treated as if I was a freak. It was acceptable, moreover, entirely normal if someone was getting not drunk – wasted, every single day. Doing drugs also wasn’t seen as a bad thing. The most important things was to be as skinny as possible. They could do anything to keep the perfect size zero. Being on a diet, or even not eating at all just to please the bookers, to get more jobs and to finally hear that you did good job, and that you are worth something. After hours of working everyday going to the club to earn some extra money, because pocket money wasn’t enough for food, everything was being spend on public transport. Trying to smile when you have a bad day, jumping in too small shoes and behaving as if everything was just fine after hearing all those mean words thrown in your face by clients. Bearing the pressure and all of the mentioned above just to earn maybe not even 100 dollars for three months.

What is the saddest thing about people who decide to earn for a living being a model? They are inconceivably smart, but they had no chance to find full employment in their countries for various reasons. All of them needed money. One of my model-friends is a lawyer, another one needed to earn money to pay the tuition fee in order to finish her psychology university. Being dragged in the modelling industry it is hard to get out of this rat race. Every single disadvantage seems to be repaid in the moment when you see yourself on the cover of the magazine. It can bring a smile to your face but it will never make you forget what you have been through.

Models are the most independent, lonely, stranded, but still emotional and helpful people I have ever met. Although people decide to leave modelling behind – it have a huge impact on who they become. From a kid living in a fool’s paradise they change into an independent, strong person who can put up with everything and deal with the biggest problems.

What does the limelight blot out? Tears, pain and the desperate rat race to perfection.

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